It’s not just me; scientist have confirmed that there is a modern epidemic in America. In the midst of social media notifications, text alerts, and new emails, people are becoming lonelier. In between potlucks, get togethers and coffee dates, there is an ache in the heart of many for someone to understand them, and for true companionship.
Single girls look at dating and married couples, thinking the secret to happiness lies in having a soulmate, a confidante. Married couples think it is in having a more sensitive, more compassionate partner.
What is the answer to loneliness?
A relationship with Jesus. And encapsulated within this relationship is everything and more you could ever want.
I am going to share with you something I wrote during a time when I felt really lonely.
“The more people I hang out with, the more alone I feel. Why do others get their dreams of having a perfect boyfriend or spouse while I am older than them and still single? And lonely. Why do they get to be happy and have someone to hug them while I am stuck to cry alone, and no one would ever find out. Is life fair?”
Sounds pretty pathetic, doesn’t it? I was focused on all the wrong things. I wanted what I couldn’t have, and didn’t want what I could have . Here’s a few things I have learned (and am still learning) as I walk to through life (and singleness), and fight the loneliness battle along with so many others.
Life isn’t fair.
You would think that should have been obvious to me. What I might have to go through, someone else may not. But the lessons I learn from life’s trials will prove invaluable later in life. (think of the virtues one might learn from loneliness. Patience, total dependence on God, contentment, etc.)
Being alone doesn’t equal lonely.
Some of the most precious times we have with God is when we are alone.
Singleness is a special time in our life.
We have opportunities as twenty-something singles that married couples don’t get, and teenagers don’t get. Cherish this time; we can spend our energy, time and resources boundlessly on others (which helps battle loneliness.)
Jesus makes the best friend.
Jesus has experienced life just like all of us. And if anyone has felt misunderstood and alone, I’m pretty sure He has. Running to His open, comforting arms of love has been the best decision I could have made.
God needs to be the first person I go to.
It is great to have friends to listen and support us, but when would God get to wipe my silent tears, comfort my hurting heart or understand my predicaments if I always expected someone else too ? When would He get to speak words of wisdom to me, or become my best friend and closest confidant if I was continually running to someone else to get those needs met?
Reach out to others.
Getting our mind off ourselves, and onto others just helps. It is biblical, and definitely worth your time. If you are feeling lonely, reach out.
If you are feeling lonely, for whatever reason, remember that the answer to our loneliness is Christ. Loneliness is a reminder that He is wanting some more time with you. He wants to hear whats on your heart. Your fears, your struggles. He is your biggest fan , and if anyone wants to see you go higher, deeper and further in your Christian life, It is Him. He is more understanding than any earthly friend or relative could ever be.