Young ladies, we often see sexual sin as a ‘guy’ problem, which leads to there being little discussion with girls about purity in their lives. Lots of embarrassment comes along with this taboo topic, while girls continue to struggle alone because they are afraid people will think they are ‘weird’.
I am hoping to break the ice a little bit, and let you know that you are not the only one. There are many, many girls (more than you realize) that struggle with this very thing. You are not alone, and there is hope for you!
What are some sexual sins that girls face?
In this day and age, there is something on the internet ‘for everyone’. Women have been caught in the trap of porn, and more and more are using it to fill a void in their life, fuel their imagination, and fulfill their desire of love. And even ‘soft’ pornography is enough to defile you… stay away, (far, far away) from even a hint of immorality, nudity, and lust.
Surfing the internet can fill up some extra time, maybe bust some boredom, but all too often, we innocently stumble upon something (an image, video or advertisement) that is immoral. It sticks with us, piques our curiosity, and often has us out looking for more, thinking about it, or at least hoping to see it again.
Having accountability with your internet use is always a good idea. Even if you think you would never stumble, having it in place ensures that you have at least an extra accountability if you would ever be tempted.
Do you have trouble letting your mind wonder to places it should not go? Maybe something you read in a book, saw on the internet, or things you have seen before come back to you more often than you would like… Have you ever noticed how those things stick with us so well but memorizing scripture is so hard?
A renewing of our mind, studying scripture, singing godly songs, journaling, reading good books… All these things are what it takes to keep our mind in the right place. If you struggle here, I suggest you find a scripture verse that encourages you and memorize it for times you are tempted.
While it is true that most guys are more visual, girls also can get turned on by a guys ‘hot body’, close physical contact, and partially dressed men. Keeping our eyes to ourselves can sometimes prove to be a tougher job then we think it should be. What are some ways we can keep our eyes turned away from things that are impure?
Imagine what you would do with your eyes if Jesus were next to you… Or what if your future husband was standing next to you? Would you look away? Keep pondering those immoral thoughts? Sit so close to that ‘hottie’? How would you like your future husband to act towards other women, and immodesty? Look away, and stay pure, right? Then in the same way, you are also going to need to keep yourself.
Online Dating Sites and Chat Rooms / Texting
Dear sisters! Beware… This may seem like harmless fun at first… meeting strangers online, being called all kinds of endearing names, having fun, texting, etc and etc… But I have seen it do an enormous amount of damage on girls who have gone much further than they ever thought they would. What was suppose to be harmless fun, turned out to be much worse. Texting quickly turns in ‘sexting’, a normal picture isn’t enough for him anymore, and pretty soon, you don’t know what you have gotten yourself into. You have given away pieces of your heart and yourself to so many complete strangers ( or people that you maybe thought you knew).
It seems fun. But the pleasure is only short lived…. giving out personal phone numbers, addresses, and pictures is dangerous and unwise. Stay away from online dating, and risque chat rooms (or any chat room for that matter). Save yourself for the one you will marry.
Help for those who have fallen:
Purity is a big issue. Human nature desires someone to hold, to love, and to be intimate with. This is a normal, natural desire, and isn’t something that should be deemed as unholy. It is holy and wonderful in its right place and time. But until then, we need to have self control, and make wise decisions in order to keep our selves pure.
If you have fallen in this area, don’t feel defeated. There is hope for you.
Maybe you struggle with fantasy. Maybe you are addicted to pornography. Perhaps you have completely given yourself away.
I have news for you. God loves you. He can wash you pure and white again, and all you need to do is ask.
“Come now, let us reason together, says the LORD: though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool. Isaiah 1:18
Leaving our sin behind is usually the hardest. It comes back to haunt us, to tempt us. And some things simply become a habit that is hard to break.
Accountability in this area is extremely helpful. Have someone ask you from time to time how you are doing and give them ways to pray for you. I suggest you seek out a mature, godly sister for this sensitive issue.
Find something to replace the sin you left behind. If you were reading filthy literature, replace it with godly books. If you were wasting time on chat rooms, spend the day encouraging a widow.
So, dear girls, keeping ourselves pure is a command straight from the Bible. If you have fallen, determine from this day on to keep yourself. If you have stayed pure this far, pray for God’s grace, and do what ever you can to help guard your eyes, thoughts and body.
“But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or any kind of impurity.” Eph. 5:3 NIV
There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it. 1. Cor. 10: 13